Little Good Things

When Abhi and Achu were sick last week, throughout the weekend, I didn’t freak out much. We took Achu to ER at 2 in the morning. She had such high temperature. I don’t think I ever felt a  105+F fever before. Sunday morning, we took them to the hospital. Since Achu had high fever, doctor wanted to do a urine test. Imagine urine test on a diaper baby. Sigh. They put in a catheter and it took few tries. Achu screamed and screamed.

Still, end of the day, I felt okay. I remember I cleaned up the house and the kitchen like I do normally. End of the day, I was also feeling normal (Of course, the real drama started on Monday). I was also very thankful to the little things happening around. I am very surprised at myself (and proud ) at how I behaved like these times were normal and noticed the little good things. What they said is true. Life is all about little good things.

♦ We started for ER when Achu had high fever. We gave her medicine and by the time we reached ER, her fever had come down. She was looking better, but her eyes. My God. I could tell she was sick, just by looking at her eyes. Achu was cranky at the hospital because she didn’t want to stay there. She said bye-bye to everybody and told me ‘go out’ a hundred times. When we were finally leaving, one of the physicians got Achu a little tiger cub teddy bear. It was so cute. Achu hugged it immediately. It felt good to see the kind gesture of a stranger to make a baby smile. (On as ide note, I hoped at least now Achu will cling on to this bear and forget her blanket – which are always a tripping hazard when walking. Achu hugged the bear couple of times and kicked it away later to go get her blanket 🙂 )

♦ Next day at the hospital, Achu was all cranky, sleepy and crying. Guess what Abhi was doing. He was all excited and happy about the new place he got to explore. Ran around. Gave Murali a good exercise. I looked and he was all smiles. He read a book with Murali, explored all cabinets. He even took a bit of paper, settled on the floor and tore it into tiny pieces. I felt so better looking at him play like that. How awesome is that. My one baby makes me smile when I am having a tough time with other baby crying. (Advantages of having twins#1024).

♦ Back from the tests, I was putting Achu to bed in our room when I heard Murali in the kitchen. I thought he was eating lunch. I just had some juice so I wasn’t expecting to eat anything yet. But to my pleasant surprise, instead of eating, Murali brings me lunch. 🙂 He has been doing it too many times now.

♦ I think this sick week is the time we watched most TV compared to all previous months. Both Abhi and Achu have been cranky and they didn’t even want to read books, so we switched TV on. We played Harry Potter and we all watched it. Abhi and Achu sitting on their Bear and Haathi set on the extra bed. We even watched curious George and Caillou. After she got better, Achu was still asking me, ‘Amma, play Caillou amma’. We told her no and looks she forgot all about it.

♦  One of the weekend evenings, I stepped into shower and realized I didn’t take head bath in a week. It happens to me a lot. In my world, taking long time to shower is a big deal and I got that on the weekend. 🙂

♦ Being sick was also the reason Abhi and Achu learnt the words medicine and thermometer. Even if they meant ‘No medicine’ and wanted to play with thermometer trying to scan their foreheads all the time.

♦ Weather has been good on and off, but lucky for us weekend weather was good. We stepped out for stroller walk in the evening. Instead of just walking, Murali took us to the nearby Starbucks and it was really a nice change sitting outside. Murali ordered us a Strawberry Smoothie and for the first time, Achu tasted the smoothie, told me it was ‘Strawbie’ and kept saying ‘Yummy. Yummy’. Abhi didn’t want anything with the smoothie.

♦  Second best thing that happened in the weekend was that we picked this bookshelf for Abhi and Achu. All the books in the shelf are Abhi, Achu’s. 🙂 And this also happens to be the first piece of furniture we bought for our new home. Bookshelf looks super cute.

♦ Oh. Wait for the first best thing. My latest addiction. Pinterest. God know why it took me so long to check it out. I am hooked. Through out the tiring days, not just the weekend, Browsing pins is all I do. My pin board is growing and I am mostly focused on home decor stuff. It sure is something I look forward to anytime.

 

Dream

It’s been a dream of mine to own a home for more than 7 years now. A place I could call our own. A place where our family could grow together; Where we make the best memories; A place which I could decorate the way I always wanted. The dream has eluded me for so long now. And finally, finally, it’s close to coming true. 🙂 In few weeks, we should be moving to our own place. The journey to getting to owning a house and finding this home is really long, but I will save that for another post. Today, I just want to say how happy I am about us going to move to our home soon.

Interestingly, buying, or even looking at this home wasn’t on our list. We went to see another house nearby and ended up walking into this home, seeing the ‘for sale’ board outside. I had earlier seen this home on the listings, and liked it. When I mentioned this to Murali, he didn’t even look at it because we were looking at a different range. But, after we went to the home, we just liked it. We made an offer that day (actually we made three offers on three different houses that day 🙂 ) and we got this one. I always thought when I got the house, I would be so happy. But I found myself confused. Well, that story is for another post. Couple of days later, we gave our approval to buy the home. We are at the process of getting the bank work etc. done now. Murali is doing all the boring work, while I am spending my time doing online furniture shopping and deciding how  I am going to decorate the house. Honestly, sometimes I think the whole point of owning a home is so that I could decorate it :). . I love love love decorating homes. Earlier, when I was not in good mood, I would go buy something for the home. Even now, no matter how crazy my day is,  I cleanup at the end of the day. Kids have been making it tough for me to find more time to maintain home even better. I took it easy because I knew we would move it. That wont be the case for my new home. Its going to be the best looking home. At least to my eyes. 🙂 But, of course there is the budget to it. Murali is asking me to buy whatever I want, not looking at the price. But, I don’t  think I want to do that. We bought the home at a very high price point, so, I want to be cautious in what I spend. So, lets see how it goes.

Coming to the home, it’s a pretty spacious home with a beautiful backyard. I am not a garden person at all. But, I have tons of ideas on what to do. So, I officially outsourced the garden work to Murali and P. They will be the garden people (I didn’t want to offend them by calling gardeners 🙂 ). I will own everything inside. Murali and I agreed that for backyard projects, I will give ideas and Murali will pick and execute. For, inside the home, Murali will gives ideas and  I will pick and execute (Psst. I only said that to make him happy. I will listen, ignore and do what I wanted to do 🙂 )

I can’t wait to buy the decorations, get everything set and see my home the way I wanted to do. Somewhere inside, I fear that I will buy things I don’t like because of the budget and will be disappointed. So, I have to be cautious balancing.

At this point, I am equally thrilled and scared about the move. It’s a big event, right! So, I guess its normal. Home maintenance is another thing I am worried about. I need to see the our place is still baby safe. We got to take into account that Abhi and Achu will continue to spill and spoil things around. I don’t know what I am going to do. Sometimes I think of future when something s broken, I start crying already. Oh. My perfect place doesn’t look so perfect anymore, etc.

Anyway, I have more worries and another post for future soon, but I am excited about this. I cant wait to move in and live in my home (and get it decorated ) 🙂 🙂 🙂

Please wish us Lots of Good Luck. 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

Those Times. Again!

Most of the times, I look at Abhi and Achu and feel blessed to have them. I look at them amazed thinking, ‘Are these really my kids’, ‘Look at how adorably they call me amma’ etc. etc. And then there is the rest of the times. Times when they are sick. Times when they scare the hell out of me. Really. Freak me out. We have these sick periods once in a while and each time such a week happens, I feel dead scared and exhausted. Not all sick weeks are like this, though. The last to last one, not a big deal. I behave as if this is expected (and it is) and I am over it. Each time, with each sick week, I realize that I can take more and still survive.

And then something like the last week happens; It started out normally. Abhi got sick first. No cold or cough. Some fever, lots of vomiting and very very cranky. By Friday, he was doing better. I felt a bit relieved. But by night, Achu caught it. Whatever Abhi had; Only a higher version of it. At midnight, she was burning up so bad, that we gave her medicine and took her to ER. The whole weekend was spent caring for sick kids, cleaning up vomits, making them sleep, dealing with the extra cranky versions of the kids etc.

All that was fine. Nothing I haven’t seen before. In fact, by end of Sunday, I wanted to write about the little things that made me happy in the two days. I was so thankful for these little things despite kids being so sick. It came naturally to me to be happy about the little things and I was very proud of myself about that. By Monday morning, I had hoped things would come back to normal. Then it hit me bad. Monday morning, I woke up pretty early to a very crying Abhi. He wouldn’t let me put him down. Cried non-stop for an hour. He was hungry but he wouldn’t eat. When I force fed him, he vomited. Before I could change my dress he vomited again. Thrice. Answer to every question was no. I hadn’t slept well the night before, so you could imagine my condition. Being tired already, I tried to calm him down. No use. When Achu woke up, I felt I was going to die that moment. She woke up cranky too. I played something on laptop for them to watch and Abhi didn’t want that even. The whole thing went on for three hours. He finally ate a bit and slept after nanny arrived. I felt dead really. What was bothering me more was that I was going to skip work. AGAIN.

I stayed home in the morning. Screwed up my career a little more (I will fire myself for what I am these days). When I got home in the evening, situation was very chaotic. VERY. Like it was on the flight trip to India. Like it was in the first few weeks of our stay. I dread those days. Those memories drag me down so bad. And to realize that those cries can happen even now is a very scary thought for me. Somehow, we passed the evening. At sleep time, Abhi threw up again. Cried more. I was sitting in that dark bedroom, rocking him to sleep, smelling the vomit and I couldn’t help but cry over my situation. Vaks tells me this is going to be the case for another year at least and I don’t think I can take it for another year. I worry about the next time this happens. I worry about my future days, my career, my energy levels, my health etc. Looking at now, I have a nanny who is working out really well for us. P literally takes care of Abhi at nights. Each time Abhi is up, I go to the room and P sends me away, saying she will take care of him. I worry what will happen when she is gone or when we don’t have the nanny anymore. In future, how will I take care of two sick kids at nights and go to work in the morning? Murali works early hours, so he is literally unavailable any morning and hence in the nights too, unless its emergency. And even if he did help out (which he will), it’s either he or I getting tired. I feel bad for us. I feel scared thinking about all this.

I see people who have help at home or have sent kids to India for some time. But I know I wont do that. I wont ship my kids off to India, just because I can’t take care of them. What I really need is more energy. More hope that we can survive these periods. As tough as this can get, like Vaks says, its only a phase. I had lost so much hope last night, that I started feeling sick. Thinking about the low energy levels, cranky kids and those early morning meetings I always run to and deliverables in the office that I can’t really focus on. What if I screw it up?

What Else? Baby Talk

♦ Abhi takes something away from Achu. Achu is so upset. God knows what all she wanted to say in protest of that. But she is still a baby and doesn’t know all the words she can to express how much she was upset, right? So what does she do? She hears me singing at that time, “Nani teri morni ko mor legaye”, starts crying, pointing to Abhi taking that thing away from her, screaming, “Mor legaye… Mor legaye… Mor legaye..”.

♦ This time she is the culprit. And she knows it. She dumps a bowl of cereal on couch, looks at it and says, ‘What did you do on couch?’

♦ One time we caught her, out in the patio and another time on the couch, with a really serious face like she was thinking about something. So, we ask, “What are you thinking about, Achu?”. She responds, “Coffee”.

♦ Another time, she decides she needs a break. Says, “Two Mineets. I am coming”. Walks to end of the room and comes back (She is so fast, right?).

♦ Now, its Abhi’s turn to go away. “Bye Bye”, he happily announces, walking away with walker or toy suitcase or some other toy. “Where are you going, Abhi?”, we ask. “Office”. Next day, Achu says she is also going to office. Nice. I think we are good with that.

♦ “Abhi, give me, Abhi. Its Mine”. “Achu, no Achu. No touchey Achu”. “Abhi..Abhi..Abhi… Mice Abhi..Mice Abhi” (mine). Never ending screams.

♦ Abhi got hurt. Dummy hurt. Like they get 1000 times a day. Each time Abhi gets hurt, everyone has to see it. And console him. Even Achu. “Achu come here Achu. Abhi got Ishi Ishi on hand”. Next time “On Pant”. Or  “On Leg”. This morning he got Ishi Ishi on toes.

♦ Abhi’s new line is “Abhi is so sad, Amma”, “Abhi needs hug Amma”. We haven’t figured out the source of sadness yet. But he is mostly jumping around the next microsecond after he says he was sad. So, we are fine.

♦ Not just Abhi and Achu, half of our toys are also found in the patio, these days. If I haven’t cleared them by the morning, Abhi asks,”Who put Etephant out there?” (Elephant), “Who put ion out there?” (Lion). Achu, follows with her list of toys she found in the patio and why they were out there. (Answer is, of course, them)

♦  So, they left walker outside yesterday night. This morning, I asked, “What is walker doing outside?”. Abhi replies, “Walking”.

♦ Achu did the worst kind of poopy last time. I mean, cleaning poopy diapers for 23 months, you would assume I have seen it all. But, even I was surprised at what I saw. So I made an ewww face and casually said, ‘Ahh! What is this Achu?’. Achu responds, “Poopy”. Fine. I needed to hear that.

♦ Achu decides to torture P.

P asks, “Is this Achu’s jacket?”

Achu: “Is this Achu’s jacket?”

P: “Yes or No”.

Achu:  “Yes or No”

P laughs, P: “Yes?”

Achu:  “Yes?”

P: “Or no?”

Achu: “Or no?”

P decided to not ask Achu questions anymore. Wise choice.