For the very first time, we are visited by the founders of “Babies Against Milk” organization – Abhi and Achu. In this 101 , they enlighten the tiny people on different ways of refusing milk and driving adults crazy. So, if you are a new baby in the world (and if you can read this), this is for you.
1. Like Abhi, You can shake your head left to right multiple times. Chances are, at first, your parents will laugh at your skill in shaking head, later they will be angry. But, trust us, they will end up thinking how cute you are when you are persistently shaking head.
2. Like Achu, You can save time-wasting tasks like drinking milk to sleep time. So you are sleeping and then the adults feed you. Multi-tasking, already. Nice.
3. Like Abhi, You can shut your lips really tight. And once in a while throw a really cute smile at the parent. Mommy keeps going aww over your dimples and smiles and you are saved from drinking. Mission accomplished.
4. Like Achu, you can use your hands to push the bottle away. We mean, really PUSH it away. Be sure to use both the hands or they will think you are not being intense enough on your refusal. If you are get tired pushing the bottle, just put the hands in front of your mouth and cover it. There is no way adults can get past that.
5. Like Abhi, you can pretend to be in deep sleep. Because you have already set the stage well that the baby doesn’t sleep much or is tired, you will be left alone.
6. Like Achu, You can let the bottle nipple inside, but just keep pushing it from one side to other. Do suck once in a while or the adults are going to be pretty mad. This way, you push the feeding time to extremes, without emptying the bottle much. They will get tired and give up soon. You see they dont have the patience we have.
7. This one is just to drive the parents to extreme crazy. Like Abhi, You can drink milk (follow any of the listed golden rules), but do drink. As soon as you are done and your mom completes celebrating her little victory, throw up everything. Yep. Every drop of what you just drank.
8. Another really smart one. Like Achu, you can suck, but don’t swallow anything. Just spit it out when your mouth is full. Beware, you will hear the adults start screaming at you. So keep your smile weapons ready.
And finally, don’t forget to invent new ways everyday. Parents might be stronger than us, but they don’t have something we have. All the time in the world.
Abhi & Achu